Are you worried about gangs?

Gangs and their associated consequences have become an increasingly high profile issue over the past couple of years. It is not surprising that individuals and communities are becoming increasingly concerned.

It is important to look at the whole picture and behind the headlines. Not all young people who hang around together are in a gang and not all gangs engage in criminal activity. Furthermore, according to official crime statistics, gang crime is relatively rare and you are unlikely to become a victim of it.

However, there are certain hotspots in our inner cities. Young people in particular can feel threatened by gang violence. Often, this is a trigger for joining a gang or carrying a weapon. In fact, if you carry a weapon or engage in criminal gang activity you are much more likely to make yourself a victim.

St Giles Trust's SOS Project works with active gang members to help them turn their lives around and break free of this lifestyle. You may want to look at our films on You Tube www.youtube.co.uk/SOSProject

Help for parents, carers or guardians

Don't blame yourself - Even with good parental support, young people can be easily attracted into negative habits and associations. And whilst we know the negative reasons for joining a gang, there are often positive, valid reasons why young people get involved in them. Bear this in mind when you speak your child.

There is fantasy - Young people can be bombarded with images of gangs through films, music and exposed to violence through games. All these can glorify gangs and violence but don't show the reality of the death and destruction they can cause for families, friends and the communities we live in.

Things to look out for:

Gang symbols or tags on schoolbooks, bags, bedroom posters and personal possesions - if you notice anything like this ask your child what is stands for and what does it mean for them.

Clothing - sometimes young people wear clothing to align themselves to specific groups. Again, ask them about it and why they feel it is necessary.

Postcodes and unsafe areas - this is harder to spot but sometimes young people align themselves to postcodes and have no-go areas. If your child shows reluctance going into a specific area ask them why - and be persistent.

Truancy - have you spotted anything or has the school raised any concerns? If they are not at school, the question is where are they?

Sudden changes in your child's selection of friends - friends fall out and change all the time but what do you know about who your child hangs out with? What do they do when they go out?

Gang names - does your child's group of friends have a 'name'? If so, what does it say about how they regard themselves?

Signs of bullying - this can be a big issue. Be aware that your child may experience bullying and pressure to join a gang. They need you for support so make time to listen to them and encourage them to trust you.

Secrecy - if you are in doubt as to what they are doing in their spare time, ask them and be ready to challenge if necessary.

Possessions - look out for them possessing relatively large sums of money or bringing expensive items home. Ask yourself do they have possessions they couldn't have brought. Be ready to challenge excuses.

Police - is your child getting into trouble with the police? Be ready to challenge any signs of unnecessary or unacceptable behaviour. Make a compact and have consequences if it is broken.

Get IT aware - be aware of the websites your child is viewing. Social networking sites can give access to words and images glorifying gang culture. Some gangs even have their own websites. Put the computer in the main room and monitor what they are viewing. Be aware that chat rooms and texts can be used to bully young people to joing gangs. Monitor games for inappropriate content and if necessary play the games with them.

Hear the music - most rap music is fine, but a small minority of it is associated with gangs and can be threatening and violent. It makes sense to know what your child is listening to and what the music is about.

Alongside St Giles' SOS Project, there are a couple of other places you can go to for help and support. Both of these are based in Southwark in south London.

From Boyhood to Manhood Foundation - FBMF is an independent, Ofsted regulated school providing support to boys of African or Afro-Caribbean descent who are in danger of or are already educationally and socially excluded. www.usatfbmf.com

Eternal Life Support Centre - provides a wide range of support to young people and parents including one-to-one mentoring, counselling, and life skills training. Works with individuals involved in gang, gun and knife crime to reintegrate them into society and develop self confidence. www.elscuk.com

Help for young people

Did you know that the maximum penalty for carrying a knife is up to four years in prison? And there are worse things than prison... you could end up dead.

There is NO safe place to stab someone.

People say they carry knives or hang out in gangs for protection but the fact is, just by being in a gang, you attract trouble. If you carry a knife, you are more likely to use it and get stabbed yourself - often with your own weapon.

Forget the hype and read on...

Why join a gang?
Being in a group or gang meets a need. We all want to feel loved, respected, protected, needed and achieving our dreams. However, some people know this and use it to get us to do things they don't want to go at alone. There are better ways of meeting our needs. We don't all have to be in gangs - we just have to make the right choice.

If you are involved, or in danger of becoming so, and you want to get out, here are some tips you should try.

Play it safe - never tell the gang you want out directly. Instead simply start spending time doing other things. Look around. Try sports, youth clubs, recreation centres... even spending time with your family.

Forget the Garms - sometimes, dressing or talking in a certain way makes you feel safe because other people are scared of you or know you are from a certain group. However, are you really defined by what you wear or how you carry yourself? Do you really need to make other people feel afraid so you can feel good about yourself?

Know that associations can be deadly - find out who your real friends are. Can you trust them? Do they bring positivity or negativity in your life? Are they a magnet for trouble? When they're beefing about someone or something, do they tend to drag you in? Many violent situations are brought about purely by associations. It is a sad fact of life that some people around you don't always want the best for you and they drag you into their troubles not because they care but because they don't want to go at things alone. These days carrying a weapon has BIG consequences but some people get others to take the risks because of this. If your friends are encouraging you to do negative things then it's time to take the toughest choice and cut them loose - for good.

Be prepared to step back - if you see a situation brewing - a disagreement, a dispute or even a fight - take the harder choice and take a step back. A lot of young people end up wounded (or worse) or in prison because they decided to 'represent their name' or 'defend their ends'. Let's get real, if you end up locked up or buried none but your closest will recount years later the famous moment you did x, y or z - and that goes for your street name as well.

Think outside of the box and get good at making excuses - family, close friends and loved ones can help you with this, but if not, find someone you can trust for help. Some former gang members have said that when they started trying to get out they stopped taking phone calls from their gang and had their family tell friends they weren't home. After a short while, old friends will get the message. 

Find someone you can trust - it is really sad but some people get kicks out of preying on the weak. If you find yourself in a situation where you think you are being bullied, being pushed to do things, or you feel there is no way out. Find somone you can trust and who genuinely cares and talk to them to look at your options. There are always alternatives. Be prepared to take them.